Belief Makers

Holding on...
It has been different with old friends and family whom I rarely see or speak. Some do their best to get used to the new name by taking small steps, which means the process of name change takes a longer time than I wish for!

Then there are people who say that it's difficult. They do this in a question sort of way, as if they hope I would change my want for being called Joy when I realize it's difficult for them. The funny thing is that this could have worked with Joyce, because I used to operate on "indirect requests". In relationships Joyce would not ask for what she wanted, but she would "indicate" it, and the people she interacted with would do the same. An example would be that you did something I didn't like. I would then become sad and you would stop what you was doing, and do your best to guess what I wanted or didn't want. I do not operate that way anymore!

A fun observation has been with friends who started to call me Joy and then stopped after we didn't meet for a while. Most of them stopped because they spent more time with other people who had not gotten used to my new name.

Then there are a few people who not only say it's difficult to call me Joy, but seem to have taken the decision that they do not want to call me Joy. As I think of it, most of these people are people I see as people who often seem to be resistant to change and who seem somewhat controlling.

What do you call yourself?
Now, how can the information written above, relate to you, if you are still holding you original birth name? Well, think about how you use names for people or things. Do you have a nickname that others use for you? Does everyone use that name? Do people tend to use your first name or your nickname? Do they use them consistently or just once in a while?

I've called Sushi my favorite food the last years, but at times it's not. Do you keep your favorite food your favorite food or does it change over time?

How much are you attached to names or the use of names? Does it matter if people pronounce your name in a certain way, or can they do what ever they want to?

A New Option
When this Blog started, I didn't like the name "A New Option". I saw it as an opposition to "The Old Option" and I made the assumption that in order to call something new, something else would have to be old! I did not want to call "The Option Institute" and all their teachings old. It definitely wasn't old to me! I felt I was still learning to use all the tools.

But then I realized that I didn't have to think that way. At the Option Institute they teach that happiness is a choice. It's an option. But in my life many people do not see the world that way. Not all people seem to be ready for this new option that happiness IS a choice! Did I just say "this NEW Option"? Well, that's what it is to most people. And talking about new options rather that options (in general) does suggest that it's ok for people to not have seen the happy option before, and that it is not something they HAVE to do, it's just A New Option to consider.

I'm getting more and more excited about the huge difference it makes about which words we use, and which meaning we give the words we hear or read about.

I invite you to pay attention to your language, to think about what you call all the different things and people in your life, and see how you change your words in different situations and ... What do you call yourself?